"A considerable proportion of the population in post-industrial societies experiences substantial difficulties in the domain of mating. The current research attempted to estimate the prevalence rate of poor mating performance and to identify some of its predictors. Two independent studies, which employed a total of 1,358 Greek-speaking men and women, found that about 40% of the participants experienced poor performance in either starting or keeping an intimate relationship, or in both areas."
It has been proposed that one reason behind the high prevalence of poor mating performance is the mismatch between ancestral and modern conditions (Apostolou, 2015a). More specifically, selection forces have adjusted the adaptations involved in mating to function optimally in a specific environment. When the environment changes, selection forces will adjust these adaptations to work optimally in the new setting (Lynch, 2010; Nielsen & Slatkin, 2013). Nevertheless, this process takes several generations, and in the meantime, there would be many individuals who have adaptations that are not well adapted to the demands of the novel environment, a problem known as evolutionary mismatch (Crawford, 1998; Li, van Vugt, & Colarelli, 2018; Maner & Kenrick, 2010). How many people are affected depends on how drastic and how recent the change in the domain of mating has been. If the change has been small, it is expected that most adaptations would interact with the novel environment reasonably well, so few people would be affected. On the other hand, if the change in the environment has been substantial, several adaptions may not be able to interact effectively with the very different environment, resulting in many people experiencing poor mating performance.
More specifically, anthropological evidence from contemporary preindustrial societies, along with historical evidence from ancestral preindustrial societies, suggests that the contemporary environment associated with mating is very different from the ancestral environment. In more detail, anthropological evidence indicates that in a preindustrial context, mate choice is typically regulated and individuals are not free to choose their mates, who are chosen by their parents (Apostolou, 2007, 2010). Evidence from a sample of 190 contemporary foraging societies indicated that the most frequent mode of long-term mating in about 70% of cases was arranged marriage, while free courtship marriage was a practice in about 4% of the societies (Apostolou, 2007). Evidence from contemporary preindustrial societies that are based on subsistence agriculture indicated that free courtship marriage was practised in 7% of societies for women and 23% of societies for men, while arranged marriage was the most frequent form of marriage for both sexes (Apostolou, 2010).
From here (emphasis added).
The paper is:
The paper is:
A considerable proportion of the population in post-industrial societies experiences substantial difficulties in the domain of mating. The current research attempted to estimate the prevalence rate of poor ma. .ting performance and to identify some of its predictors. Two independent studies, which employed a total of 1,358 Greek-speaking men and women, found that about 40% of the participants experienced poor performance in either starting or keeping an intimate relationship, or in both areas. Furthermore, emotional intelligence, Dark Triad traits, jealousy, and attachment style were found to be significant predictors of mating performance. In particular, higher emotional intelligence and narcissism were associated with higher performance in mating, while higher psychopathy, jealousy and an avoidant attachment style were associated with lower mating performance.
Menelaos Apostolou, et al., "Mating Performance: Exploring Emotional Intelligence, the Dark Triad, Jealousy and Attachment Effects" 10 J. of Relationship Research e1 (January 11, 2019). https://doi.org/10.1017/jrr.2018.22
It would be interesting to compare relationship aptitude in places where free courtship marriage is more v. less recent and what circumstances may have favored free courtship marriage in places where it was an earlier outlier.
My intuition is that this doesn't actually matter and that spouse choice styles are driven more by economics than long run cultural legacies. In particular, I think that it is likely that the historic success of arranged marriage and marriage stability in general was driven by economic realities leading to mutual dependence upon a spouse driven by technology that has changed which made it not very hard for even not very well matched couples to stay together and function. While, in contrast, today, technology has created a world where there is much weaker economic glue binding couples together, so only the most compatible couples can manage to weather differences and issues pulling them apart. Thus, free courtship marriage, a more accurate way of determining compatibility is needed to increase the odds of producing couples capable of sticking together in the absence of the historical levels of economic pressures serving as relationship glue.
The shift away from arrange marriage is quite recent. I have relatives I've met in previous generations who had arranged marriages and so has my wife.
Also, there is a continuum between an arranged marriage to someone that a prospective spouse has never met or even actively dislikes with little notice and no meaningful opportunity to say no, to active parental support and guidance in courtship, to strong parental capacity to disapprove of a child's potential mate, to spouse selection with no parental involvement at all. And, when there is parental involvement there is a continuum between involvement intended to achieve the parent's objectives and involvement in which a parent is trying to optimize a child's well being in a society where the competence of people at making the best decision for themselves is doubted.
There are also possibilities off this continuum, for example, where a woman has no say, e.g. since she is abducted or a POW or a slave or community or religious leaders decide, but there is no parental or family involvement in the choice.
It would be interesting to compare relationship aptitude in places where free courtship marriage is more v. less recent and what circumstances may have favored free courtship marriage in places where it was an earlier outlier.
My intuition is that this doesn't actually matter and that spouse choice styles are driven more by economics than long run cultural legacies. In particular, I think that it is likely that the historic success of arranged marriage and marriage stability in general was driven by economic realities leading to mutual dependence upon a spouse driven by technology that has changed which made it not very hard for even not very well matched couples to stay together and function. While, in contrast, today, technology has created a world where there is much weaker economic glue binding couples together, so only the most compatible couples can manage to weather differences and issues pulling them apart. Thus, free courtship marriage, a more accurate way of determining compatibility is needed to increase the odds of producing couples capable of sticking together in the absence of the historical levels of economic pressures serving as relationship glue.
The shift away from arrange marriage is quite recent. I have relatives I've met in previous generations who had arranged marriages and so has my wife.
Also, there is a continuum between an arranged marriage to someone that a prospective spouse has never met or even actively dislikes with little notice and no meaningful opportunity to say no, to active parental support and guidance in courtship, to strong parental capacity to disapprove of a child's potential mate, to spouse selection with no parental involvement at all. And, when there is parental involvement there is a continuum between involvement intended to achieve the parent's objectives and involvement in which a parent is trying to optimize a child's well being in a society where the competence of people at making the best decision for themselves is doubted.
There are also possibilities off this continuum, for example, where a woman has no say, e.g. since she is abducted or a POW or a slave or community or religious leaders decide, but there is no parental or family involvement in the choice.
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